So I go to this guys place to have a look at his "messed up" computer, and he gives me this long spiel about how cool his computer is etc... he said he was having problems with it and I just wanted to see what he had inside it, so I crack the case. Inside I found a 1GHz Via C3 system with 128mb of ram and an AMR modem. The only half decent hardware in this system was the 40GB Western Digital hard drive.
Keep in mind that he was promised that it was a "top of the line system" (he purchased it in mid-2003) - Looks like somebody got ripped off.
However, this isnt the kicker. After I opened up the system, I noticed (obscured by the vile AMR modem) a monstrous chunk of bone. Yes bone - the stuff dogs chew on. There were no openings in the case that could have possibly warranted the entrance of this bone - yet it was there. Thus - someone in this creepy redneck's white-trash family had stuffed a bone in there.